Since It's Christmas Time

I thought I'd tell a Christmas story. Well, sort of.

Years ago when I was brainwashed into attending church regularly, I was in several plays. One year, (seventh grade, I believe) were were doing a children's play that was loosely based on the original story. There was a reporter trying to get the main dish on the new "king." Also, the three wise men rapped.

In the beginning of the play there's a huge fuss about the census that was going on at the time. We were all supposed to be coming in to get counted, and I was appointed the mother of all the younger kids (5-7 year olds) - probably because I was the eldest girl, and the tallest. The census taker's helper was given this line about, "Geez lady! How may kids do you have?" Said character was played by the most obnoxious boy there who thought himself a crack-up and a ladies' man; he was such the opposite that most every girl wanted to smack him across his face most of the time.

When we came to that line the pastor/director called me by name and asked me to come and smack him. Every girl in the room glared at me jealously. I was befuddled. Something like this, even staged, is entirely out of my nature. Looking back, I realize that that is why he chose me. I was the only one that wouldn't have actually smacked that guy. (Not on purpose, anyway.)
It took I few times before I could swing my hand close enough to his face for it to look real from any angle.

It took I few times before I could swing my hand close enough to his face for it to look real from any angle.

It was fun, though.